Tag Archives: Good-Bye

All Good Things Must Come To An End

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My column from the Albert Lea Tribune and the Courier Sentinel the week of December 27.

image-1Sprinkled Notes by Julie Seedorf

All good things must come to an end. Yes, 2018 is ending, a new year is beginning, and with it are those resolutions that we make and break, new experiences and letting go of the old year.

I do not make resolutions anymore. I know I always break them, but I have made some decisions in moving forward in 2019. This is my last Sprinkled Notes/Something About Nothing column. I am retiring my column.

When Tim Engstrom chose me, an unknown, to write a weekly column somewhere around 2005 I was honored, surprised and scared. I never gave a thought to how long it would last, as I didn’t expect it would endure for many years. Yet, here it is 2018, and Sarah Stultz, now the editor of the Albert Lea Tribune, continued to have faith in me to reach people with my writing.

Over the years I have written about silly things and serious events and have given what was probably my unwanted opinion on many topics. I don’t think I ever missed a week in all those years. At times it was a joy and easy to put the words on paper. At other times, when I was sick, going through the loss of loved ones or just plain having a bad day, it was a struggle to pen my thoughts, yet I found during those times it was when I seemed to reach my readers the most.

I shared my problems with depression, and many of you could relate and accepted and shared and helped me through it. Many readers have become friends and expanded my world beyond boundaries that I ever imagined. I was amazed by the global reach of the column. I am grateful for all of this.

I choose now to let go of this column. It is time to go on to new adventures and let someone else take the reins of getting to know you, fabulous readers. I feel so blessed to have had this experience.

I am not giving up writing. I am in the midst of finishing my sixth book in the Fuchsia, Minnesota Series, and I have other projects in the works too. I will continue my blogs at sprinklednotes.com and julieseedorf.com if you want to find me. There is also my Facebook author page at facebook.com/julie.seedorf.author. What I am giving up is the weekly deadlines.

I wish you a new year blessed with love, kindness, good health and new adventures. Thank you for your support over all the years. Keep in touch and keep reading. Reading takes you away, expands your horizons and can be your peace in a chaotic world

“So comes the snow after fire, and even dragons have their ending.” — J. R. Tolkien

This is Wells resident Julie Seedorf’s final column.

The Final Good-Bye

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IMG_3258The truth is you don’t know what is going to happen tomorrow. Life is a crazy ride, and nothing is guaranteed.” — Eminem

The quote above was certainly true in our lives the last couple of weeks. We had a fun vacation up north and the next day we were sitting by the bedside of my brother-in-law who was in his final moments.

As I look back on the week it was a week of blessings. We spent time with good friends. We laughed, ate the fish the men caught, explored shops and took the time to relax and enjoy life. It wasn’t the fact that we were on vacation that made it special; it was the fact we shared the week with close friends creating memories.

We got the call that we were needed  at the bedside of my brother-in-law, Evan, as we were driving home from the lake. The next few days by his bedside we  prayed, cried, reminisced and waited for God  to call him home. As hard as it was, it too was a blessing because we could be there in his final moments. We could connect with others who loved this man. We don’t always come into this world easily at birth and we don’t always go out easily either. The last few days were a struggle for him and we didn’t want him or his wife  being alone at this difficult time.

I wondered as we sat there waiting, what he would have said to us if he would have had the power to speak. What would he say about what we were saying? What was he thinking? Were we giving him comfort? Or would he have told us to go away?

It had been a long journey for Evan. His diagnosis was Alzheimer’s. It wasn’t the first in the family, and I suspect it won’t be the last. He was not the person the last few years we all remembered. Yet, he was still loved in his anger, quietness and joy,  remaining the husband, father and brother in our lives.

Everyone deals with a loved one’s decline differently. Some stay away because they can’t handle seeing their loved one in this changing state. They want to remember them as they were. I get that. And again I support those who have to do what they do to take care of themselves. For myself at this time in my life I think about the person going through the process of leaving this earth or who is in declining health. It isn’t about me; it is about them and what they are feeling if those they love stay away.

We all need someone to share the rough spots of our life, to help us get through the hills and the valleys, whether it is an illness where we are healed, or an illness where God chooses to take us home. We need someone to care.

I have not always been by the side of someone I loved, or visited a friend when they are going through their final weeks. I too have stayed away. When my friend Mary was ready to leave this world I stayed away. I was sick and suffering depression and I couldn’t handle it. I so regret that I stayed away and didn’t say goodbye, but I get it when seeing someone you love in pain is too much.

I haven’t always helped those who needed help. I haven’t always had the help of those I thought I could depend on, but I know it is not because I didn’t care or they didn’t care, but because of where they were or where I was in my life, there was nothing left inside of them or me to help someone else.

This time, I was able to say goodbye to the man who was the first person besides my mother-in-law to welcome me into the family and accept me as I was. I felt privileged to have the time to say goodbye to the man who was godfather to my children and took that role very seriously. My children all have special memories of their Uncle Evan as do all his nieces and nephews.

If we needed help, Evan was there to lend a hand. He was there to give his opinion and we could take it or leave it. He left us with sayings we will never forget and memories that will always have a hold on our hearts.

Don’t be afraid to hold the hand of someone you love in their final moments. You will find you won’t remember what they looked like in their final days, but you will remember the lifetime of memories that you were given and the smiles that came before.

Rest in peace, Evan. When we asked you how you were, you always replied, “Not as good as some, but better than most.” In our eyes you were always the best.