Wedding Anniversary Memories

It is my 43rd Wedding Anniversary today. It is hard to believe so many years have passed. The day we were married was a beautiful and crisp day. We didn’t need anything but a light coat. The next morning we woke up to below zero temps. It was a good thing we were driving to California for our honeymoon.

We had a wonderful wedding day. Were there snafu’s? Of course there were. I have watched the shows on TV recently about all the problems at weddings and how upset the bride gets when things do not go exactly as planned. We had few of those things but they didn’t reduce me to tears instead I took them as memorable moments even on my wedding day.

The first thing that happened was that a skunk had sprayed futures sister-in-law’s  house where my husband to be was living. The skunk chose to do this the night before the wedding. Needless to say the clothes that were brought along on our honeymoon didn’t smell too good. They had to be aired out on the back seat of the car and we traveled with our windows open for awhile. It was lucky the tuxedo hadn’t been picked up yet so the smell didn’t affect the wedding ceremony.

The second thing that happened was that one of  our ushers didn’t make it until the wedding was over. He lived with a group of guys and they had all been out on a pre wedding party. The friends got up and didn’t notice our usher was still sleeping. They thought he had left. They made the wedding but he didn’t.

The third thing that happened we discovered on our honeymoon. My sister-in-law had sewed all my husbands underwear shut.

Despite those interesting beginnings we are still here together 43 years.

We have raised three children and those three children have given us four grandchildren. Those grandchildren are the icing on the cake when we get together as a family.

Was marriage what I expected? I don’t know what I expected. We all have those little kids dreams of marrying our Prince Charming and living happily every after. We may do that and marry our Prince Charming but in real life, Prince Charming has little things that irritate the Princess and the Princess does little things to irritate Prince Charming. It never says that in the Fairy Tales. Did we ever hear the Princess yelling to Prince Charming “Don’t forget to put the toilet seat down.” I don’t think so.

I have read many happily ever after stories for many couples that have been married 50 and 60 years and more and they always ask them what kept them together. Their answers are usually kindness, laughter, respect for one another. Usually those articles don’t ask them about downs and what almost tore them apart and during those times what they did to keep on going as a couple. And I have to believe that every couple experiences those iffy times. Or maybe not.

Forty three years is a long time to be married. I would be lying if I said it was all roses and chocolates. It is roses and chocolates and thorns and chicken livers. Marriage is hard work. Marriage is give and take on the sides of both people. Marriage takes a lot of grit at times to get through the things that tear couples apart. Marriage takes a lot of love and forgiveness on both sides. Marriage is also having someone that knows you well enough to complete your sentences, can tell by a look whether to tease you or not, and knows when to be silent when all you want to for someone to listen. Marriage is having someone always know what will put a smile on your face.

We take vows to love and cherish in sickness and health but we don’t always think about those words. There should be something in there about the little things. I vow to love and cherish in sickness and health and not let the picky little things get in the way. “Who left the cap off the toothbrush?” “Did you shut the door?” “Were you born in the barn?” “It’s your turn to get up with Jr.” We spend time barking about the little things and soon they turn into the big things.

We have had big things. We have had little things. We have had sickness. We have had health. Do we have a perfect marriage ? I don’t know. What is a perfect marriage? I think we have had a marriage that has encountered life and we have loved, laughed, cried, been angry, suffered losses and experienced incredible joy. Through it all we have not quit even when we thought we wanted to.  Here it is  43 years and I feel so blessed that we are here together, at this time looking at the future with hope and love. Looking back at the memories I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I want to wish my husband a Happy Anniversary. I am so glad I married you.  Robert Browning said it best.  “Grow old along with me! The best is yet to be, the last of life, for which the first was made. Our times are in his hand who saith, ‘A whole I planned, youth shows but half; Trust God: See all, nor be afraid!”

Happy Anniversary Mark.aflowers


Next Stop For Granny. My Take On Being A Grandma

granny_hooks_a_crook_4Next stop on Fundinmental. I am guest blogging on this site. Read about being a real granny and my granny style. Thanks to Lori and The Great Escapes Book Tour and to Sherry for hosting me.

Help Me Write My Thanksgiving Column for Something About Nothing

Thankful by Nakeva

Thankful by Nakeva (Photo credit: Nakeva)

Column: Something About Nothing, by Julie Seedorf

Roll out those lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer. I miss summer. Yes, those lazy, hazy days of summer are gone and, instead, we are rolling out the not lazy, hazy, crazy days of holidays.

We’ll sing of mistletoe and cheer. We will be making our list and checking it twice and, really, it doesn’t matter if the kids are naughty or nice, Grandma will buy them something anyway.

The real holiday frenzy started in some stores mid-summer, especially craft stores so all the crafters could buy their materials and craft like crazy to be done for Christmas. The other stores got into the act right around Labor Day or sooner. I think they were hoping to tempt me into buying more decorations before I looked at what I already had stored in the basement.

Many Black Friday sales have begun before Black Friday and Black Friday, on occasion, seems to be every day. We are tricked into believing that the sale will only happen once. For some unexplainable reason we believe the hype so we wait in long lines to get that special item that is important, such as the big-screen television.

Here in Minnesota it is better if we get snow so everyone feels it really is Christmas. Do you suppose the retailers in Minnesota put in a request for early snow so we will get the Christmas fever early? We are excited about Christmas. What happened to Thanksgiving?

On Facebook, I have noticed many of my friends are listing something they are thankful for every day. They have the gratitude attitude.

Churches haven’t forgotten about Thanksgiving. They are getting ready for Thanksgiving services although in these modern times, many services are in the evening before Thanksgiving Day because people have things to do on Thanksgiving and are too busy to go to services.

Food shelves haven’t forgotten about Thanksgiving. They know there are many hungry people out there who won’t have a Thanksgiving meal without the food shelves.

Local organizations haven’t forgotten about Thanksgiving. Many are gearing up to provide a free Thanksgiving meal so those that are alone, homeless or without the means for a meal will have a place to go.

Stores are gearing up to be open early for Thanksgiving Deals. They haven’t forgotten Thanksgiving and are trying to make it one of the biggest shopping experiences of the season. We can’t blame them. If we as consumers didn’t give up our family Thanksgiving to shop they wouldn’t open. It seems more important for us to shop rather than spend family time and rest and relax the entire Thanksgiving Day. I have a feeling that the small mom-and-pop shops will respect the Thanksgiving family tradition and wait until Friday to reopen.

The Thanksgiving Day Parade planners haven’t forgot about Thanksgiving. Last I heard the parades were still on. Football seems to be a Thanksgiving tradition. The entire family can gather around the television to watch their games before they fall asleep on the couch from eating all that turkey that contains tryptophan.

The holidays are anything but lazy. They are crazy. They are as crazy as we make them. What we do with Thanksgiving and Christmas determines where our priorities lie. It is different for each person and each family.

My family still celebrates Thanksgiving together. We have a meal. We play games. We watch movies, and we eat. We are blessed enough to have food to put on the table and to be able to spend time together. I feel especially blessed this year. I might have two working bathrooms. I don’t have to pull in an outhouse for the grandchildren.

This is not Thanksgiving week. Look around you each day and see the snippets of Thanksgiving in the preparation of the people you meet. Take the time to contemplate what you are grateful for and what you can do to honor the holiday.

How do you prepare for Thanksgiving? Has it been more about Christmas? Or has it been about being thankful for the blessings you have received this year.

I would appreciate it if you would email me this week at and let me know if you feel the blessings of the past year. I would like my column next week to be full of statements about thankfulness and blessings for Thanksgiving from many people. I would like you to write the column with those blessings. If you want me to use your name, I will. If you don’t I won’t. I hope to hear from you.

Perhaps something you share will reach out and touch another person and remind them of what they have to be thankful for.

“Even though we’re a week and a half away from Thanksgiving, it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas.” — Richard Roeper