Tag Archives: Granny Hooks A Crook

When I Give A Book A Look!

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Cozy Cat AuthorsReviewing books that I have read is occasionally hard work. I know what it is to get a good review on a book you have written and I know what it is to get a bad review on a book you have written. There are times when someone reviews my books and offers a critical review that the review makes me a better writer and then are times when I read a review of my book that I wonder what they are talking about. I always look at the other books the person reviews. A few times I found that every book the reviewer reviewed got a bad or lukewarm review.

I felt honored at one review early on for my Granny Hooks A Crook on Goodreads. The reader gave me a four because she had just read The Help and gave The Help a five star rating. I felt honored for the four star rating she had given me.

I have given a lot of thought to what I say and how I say it when I review a book. I don’t ever want to skewer an author’s works because I know what it takes to get from start to finish, putting your heart into those words that are written for all to see in a book.

I did learn something from that reader that gave me a four because she had read The Help first. I think of that when I am clicking on those stars. A five blows me away. A four keeps me turning the pages, investing part of myself in the book by laughing, crying and feeling connected to the characters. A three has me leaving a little advice, gentle advice as to what could make it a little more to my taste. I never leave a 1 or 2.

Having said that I must also keep in mind when reading, whether the genre of the book is for me. I could easily give a one star to a history book no matter how well written and how fascinating the story was. I am not a history buff nor am I a historical romance buff so those books would get low stars from me. Is it the books fault that I didn’t like it? Is it the authors fault I didn’t like it? It merely would mean that I had no business thinking I should read the book because everyone else was gaga over it. And I’m not talking about Lady Gaga.

I try to read books occasionally that are out of my comfort zone and interest. Occasionally I am surprised and keep on reading. When I find a book that I start, and am yawning by the second or third chapter, I know it is out of my interest zone. I usually forgo leaving a comment or rating it. I do the same if there is a book that I start and absolutely do not like because of the writing. I do not rate it or leave a comment unless I am absolutely committed to leaving a review. Then I gently word what I have to say.

That is the way I rate books. I do not need to destroy a writer’s confidence or character. I do not need to attack their writing if the book is not what I feel is worth reading. Writers put their sweat, tears, heart and soul into a book and most of the time is for the sheer joy of writing.

If you are writer reading this, don’t let anyone destroy your love of writing. If you are a reader, think about your reviews. Are they accurate for what you are reviewing? And remember, be gentle with your criticism, there is a real person behind those words.

Every book you pick up has its own lesson or lessons, and quite often the bad books have more to teach than the good ones.

 Steven King

 

Granny (Granny Skewers A Scoundrel) is Visiting the Boneyard.

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I heard from Granny today from the Fuchsia, Minnesota fame. She is going to be answering questions from her readers on May 1 at Boneyard Coffee and Tea. https://www.facebook.com/events/657668800968470

She says she is excgranny always saysited but there seem to be a lot of questions about her past. Readers are asking questions about  her former high school romances. I asked her how she was going to answer those difficult questions.

Here is what she said, “Those were the days when we weren’t supposed to kiss and tell. Now everyone kisses and tells everyone, they even take selfies while they are telling everyone. So why not. I kissed and didn’t tell for all of those years. It’s exciting that now I can tell about those kisses, of course my parents are dead and in those days the only people who talked about sex was the teenagers. Parents didn’t seem to know anything about sex. Maybe that’s why we had the no kiss and tell rule. We didn’t want to shock our parents when they didn’t know what kissing was. And……..I kissed some blurpers and some slurpers and some charmers in my time. But I didn’t tell, especially about the slurpers and the blurpers out of the kindness of my heart. I wonder if those slurpers and blurpers are still around. Wait until they find out I might tell on them now. But if you know them, don’t tell them, I want it to be a surprise when their name is now in the paper for the slurping and blurping. Perhaps they will look me up to and I can find out if they are still slurping and blurping with their kisses.

Whoops, I can’t do that. What would Franklin say? Stop by and visit with me on May 1. Check out the website for Boneyard Coffee and Tea or Latte’ Da in Champagne, Illinois. And I must tell you, Franklin is not a blurper or a slurper when it comes to kisses.”

See you soon,
Granny

It is always so interesting to have a conversation with Granny. Her conversations are all over the place. I guess I will have to join the conversation on May 1 to see what she has to say.

What is Written on That Bathroom Door?

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Something About Nothing by Julie Seedorf – published April 21, 2014 Albert Lea TribuneToilet Master

What happens when you take a country granny and put her in the middle of a big city? I don’t know about other grannies, but I know this granny had many laughs on a recent weekend visit to the Twin Cities.

I mention occasionally that those of us older folks who live in rural communities need to look for ways to expand our world. I feel if we don’t take the time to look beyond what we are comfortable with and familiar with, we might miss out on wonderful experiences.

However, I never thought of the tiny way the world is changing as being in the definition of those experiences. I feel I must highlight some of the changes that are taking place in larger communities. If we don’t take the time to learn those changes, we older folks might not be able to navigate society easily. They always say changes come to bigger communities before they appear in the rural area.

One of the things I have noticed happening even in some of our smaller communities, are changes taking place in the bathrooms of retail stores, gas stations, restaurants and schools. I would imagine the bathrooms in the new school that will be opening in the fall of 2014 in my community might have some of these features.

Many of us are used to flushing toilets. We push the lever, the toilet flushes. Imagine how scary it must be for some when the toilet ghost appears and flushes the toilet automatically as they are standing up, scaring them so much that the cellphone that people are always holding, even in the bathroom,  drops out of their hand, falls into the toilet and follows the toilet ghost down the drain. Make sure when you visit the big city and use the restroom always check to see if there is a lever or an eye. Secure your cellphone tightly.

Another confusing place for this old grandma is finding how to dry your hands after washing them. It takes a clever eye to decide if you should swipe, roll, pull or tap the paper dispenser. It is fun to watch the number of people who have this problem. It would make a great “Funniest Home Video” and definitely it would be worth the $10,000 prize.

While visiting the Cities I attended a dance competition in a city high school. Another Grandma and I visited the restroom at the same time. We were the same age, and we couldn’t help but reminisce about our high school days as we saw the ad on the back of a door in the high school bathroom.

When we were in school, teachers weren’t allowed to talk about sex; parents didn’t talk about sex. Sex was a subject only high-schoolers talked about to each other, since parents and teachers didn’t seem to know much about it.

It was shocking for us oldies to find an ad giving five tips to avoid STDs. If you other older folks don’t know what that is, look it up. The high school set evidently knows. It used to be an abbreviation for standard in the olden days. Five tips to be standard? We have come a long way in society or not.

My next dilemma happened at a restaurant. They had a new pop machine. Usually you put your cup under the right flavor of drink and push your cup in on the lever and your drink is dispensed.

This time there were icons such as you have on your tablet computer. I looked at it and didn’t see any icon for water. I asked my granddaughter and with a swipe of her hand she moved to the next menu and the water icon was there. So if you are looking for a drink, remember you might have to swipe instead of push.

My daughter-in-law had to go through the drive-thru of her bank. I am used to a drive through with one lane. There were six lanes at the drive-thru. I couldn’t see anywhere that was enclosed to hold a cashier that could push out the drawer.

We pulled up next to a small screen with a tube that went into the sky. It reminded me of “The Jetsons” cartoon. The money went in, someone talked, it flew up the shoot, flew back down the shoot and had a grape sucker in the tube. I thought that was a great exchange. They say there is a sucker born every minute.

The real reason I was in the Cities was for a grandmother/mother/daughter tea. It is always a fun time.

I donned my extra conservative dress, my only dress that fit, I might add.  Every year I am reminded there is a difference between how big-city grannies dress and rural grannies dress.

The big-city grannies had spiky high heels, and, yes, they were my age, short skirts, some tight-fitting skirts, some of the colors were flamboyant and most were today’s style. Many had long, flowing hair cut in a smart style, and they looked pretty darn good for someone who was my age. I might add that I love the way big-city grannies dress.

I always expect to experience something new when I go on a fun adventure to the Cities. I never thought the things that would make me smile would be toilets and how they flush, towel holders that need a quick eye to be able to wipe your hands, getting a drink becoming a learning experience, laughing because “The Jetsons” has come true and admiring the different fashions that are worn in different settings and communities.

I learned something from every experience. It might have been small but imagine what is out there for us, if we take the time to open our eyes and look beyond our back yard. It might be a world of wonder and joy.